Conjunction of Commitment, Communication, Compromise
Sometimes the elements that make up a conjunction are not perceptible until after the fact. For this is not the exact science of astronomy where predictions of conjunctions of certitude can be made centuries, millennia in advance.
But it is in the realization of what has happened that is the happening. The near-miss . . . but better yet, the coalescing of the affinity for the things of the heart.
And it is from the perspective of looking back, that this conjunction is apparent.
The elements were already in motion. Their antecedents well established. Trajectories launched.
And one of these trajectories was a thread of a discussion in a safe and secure and sacred family forum of gay and lesbian people of a certain kinship. The trajectory was launched with a question: Can gay relationships include faithfulness?
And what should and can be expected within the sacred confines of a healthy family, the discussion was passionate, dynamic, and convoluted. It delved into the mythical families of the past . . . spanned to the reality of straight and gay relationships in this new millennium. The notion that faithfulness was the absence of hurt to another. A story, told by one, of he and his partner, their mutual implementation of what they refer to as the 3-C’s. Commitment. Communication. Compromise.
Another trajectory was started centuries ago. A group of newly arrived immigrants into a land that one day would call itself “These United States” of America. A group of people seeking relief from forced religious participation. The seeking of religious freedom, if you will. Free from the rule of a head-of-a-church monarch who would control the very venue of their salvation. Free to exercise a religious experience separate from the civil order of the land. Free to establish a congregational web of religion rather than an orthodoxy of hierarchy. Free to establish a worship ethic based on shared, participatory experience of commitment .. communication . . compromise.
Yet another trajectory is only a few months old. But a trajectory it still is. A story of the elements of commitment, communication, compromise . . . a story of how they are slowly and carefully evolving. Where there has been and still is a pull and a tug, a tear and a repair, the vigorous kneading, the development of the strands of gluten fiber that gives the strength and character to a finished loaf of bread, that gives the tensile strength to the formation of human soul-mate bonding.
And these trajectories came together in the past days, the past hours.
A near miss . . . hardly not. The unification of something deterministic . . . not hardly.
For a family discussion within the confines of a sacred discussion space by a certain gay and lesbian contingency of a unique kinship heritage brought understanding, respect, tolerance, acceptance, affirmation to each and to each other. It was living evidence of commitment . . . communication . . . compromise. And the health and well being of that family experienced edification in that trajectory experience.
And a certain church in a certain neighborhood of metro Washington DC experienced a service of re-telling of its history of commitment … communication … compromise in its centuries-old implemented model of corporate worship and governance.
And a certain trajectory of a near nascent commitment . . . communication . . . compromise, experienced a shattering and re-alignment, whereby the bonds of commitment . . . communication . . . and compromise had been stretched and now rebounded with even greater strength and vigor.
And the conjunction was, yes, a near miss . . .for at least one part of it could have failed to happen.
But from the perspective of retrospect, what could have been the near-miss was instead a beautiful coalescence of commitment . . .communication . . . compromise.
And for The Refectory Manager, the realization that it could have been a near-miss is unsettling. But The Refectory Manager does find it so comforting to realize that the conjunction that he has now seen in retrospect was indeed placed into prospect by one awesome Significant Other.
But it is in the realization of what has happened that is the happening. The near-miss . . . but better yet, the coalescing of the affinity for the things of the heart.
And it is from the perspective of looking back, that this conjunction is apparent.
The elements were already in motion. Their antecedents well established. Trajectories launched.
And one of these trajectories was a thread of a discussion in a safe and secure and sacred family forum of gay and lesbian people of a certain kinship. The trajectory was launched with a question: Can gay relationships include faithfulness?
And what should and can be expected within the sacred confines of a healthy family, the discussion was passionate, dynamic, and convoluted. It delved into the mythical families of the past . . . spanned to the reality of straight and gay relationships in this new millennium. The notion that faithfulness was the absence of hurt to another. A story, told by one, of he and his partner, their mutual implementation of what they refer to as the 3-C’s. Commitment. Communication. Compromise.
Another trajectory was started centuries ago. A group of newly arrived immigrants into a land that one day would call itself “These United States” of America. A group of people seeking relief from forced religious participation. The seeking of religious freedom, if you will. Free from the rule of a head-of-a-church monarch who would control the very venue of their salvation. Free to exercise a religious experience separate from the civil order of the land. Free to establish a congregational web of religion rather than an orthodoxy of hierarchy. Free to establish a worship ethic based on shared, participatory experience of commitment .. communication . . compromise.
Yet another trajectory is only a few months old. But a trajectory it still is. A story of the elements of commitment, communication, compromise . . . a story of how they are slowly and carefully evolving. Where there has been and still is a pull and a tug, a tear and a repair, the vigorous kneading, the development of the strands of gluten fiber that gives the strength and character to a finished loaf of bread, that gives the tensile strength to the formation of human soul-mate bonding.
And these trajectories came together in the past days, the past hours.
A near miss . . . hardly not. The unification of something deterministic . . . not hardly.
For a family discussion within the confines of a sacred discussion space by a certain gay and lesbian contingency of a unique kinship heritage brought understanding, respect, tolerance, acceptance, affirmation to each and to each other. It was living evidence of commitment . . . communication . . . compromise. And the health and well being of that family experienced edification in that trajectory experience.
And a certain church in a certain neighborhood of metro Washington DC experienced a service of re-telling of its history of commitment … communication … compromise in its centuries-old implemented model of corporate worship and governance.
And a certain trajectory of a near nascent commitment . . . communication . . . compromise, experienced a shattering and re-alignment, whereby the bonds of commitment . . . communication . . . and compromise had been stretched and now rebounded with even greater strength and vigor.
And the conjunction was, yes, a near miss . . .for at least one part of it could have failed to happen.
But from the perspective of retrospect, what could have been the near-miss was instead a beautiful coalescence of commitment . . .communication . . . compromise.
And for The Refectory Manager, the realization that it could have been a near-miss is unsettling. But The Refectory Manager does find it so comforting to realize that the conjunction that he has now seen in retrospect was indeed placed into prospect by one awesome Significant Other.
posted by The Refectory Manager | 7:40 PM
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