Does The Refectory Manager Have a Family?
My friend and former colleague of my teaching days at Pacific Union College, Betty, has just asked me in response to the story of Zebulon Vance, if I feel if I have a family?
Our fellow KinNetter and my pen-pal Nenad in Belgrade, has just established for himself, a blog. You can find it at http://saunterersjournal.blogspot.com/ .
And Betty, Nenad’s post of today about “Home” is somewhat the answer to your question as to whether or not I have a family.
In one sense, my family is Nenad’s boyhood home. A relic of the past.
And so Nenad, I flagrantly paraphrase the middle paragraph of your story . . .
Such images of my former nuclear family continue to resurface in the dream world, with the past and present converging, both unsettled and upset, seeking closure where there can be none. The marriage was over years ago under difficult circumstances and an important chapter of my personal history came to its abrupt end. In many ways I continue to deal with that loss, my emotional attachment undiminished by the passage of time.
And, then to continue, to continue with a paraphrase of Nenad’s final paragraph . . .
However, within the confines of my mind, “family” is assuming a healing power, bringing renewed sense of belonging and restored awareness of who I am and where I come from. Rather than being a mere repository of melancholic memories, it feels like the impenetrable fortress of my boyish escapism that it once was. Resurging in my dreams and meditations, uncalled for, but warmly welcomed, my “family” is still intact.
Nenad, I have already told you how beautiful and awesome your post of this morning is. Now you see why I said what I did. And I can’t thank you enough for the miraculous timing of the posting of your blog entry.
But back to family. Its intactness. Made up of concentric circles, yet intact.
And Betty, and Nenad, and KinNet, and River Road Unitarian Church and people with whom I work, and a whole bunch of others, yes. You are my family.
And my mother, my siblings, my children, my grandchildren, my extended biological connection. You are my family.
And some of you may even have wept with me a couple of weeks ago when my family chastised me for my desire for them to try to understand what Brokeback Mountain has meant to me.
But I don’t think the concept of family has ever changed.
What has changed is how I now think about its composition, its function, its purpose, and its power in essence of diversity for sustaining the survival of humanity itself.
The Refectory Manager
Our fellow KinNetter and my pen-pal Nenad in Belgrade, has just established for himself, a blog. You can find it at http://saunterersjournal.blogspot.com/ .
And Betty, Nenad’s post of today about “Home” is somewhat the answer to your question as to whether or not I have a family.
In one sense, my family is Nenad’s boyhood home. A relic of the past.
And so Nenad, I flagrantly paraphrase the middle paragraph of your story . . .
Such images of my former nuclear family continue to resurface in the dream world, with the past and present converging, both unsettled and upset, seeking closure where there can be none. The marriage was over years ago under difficult circumstances and an important chapter of my personal history came to its abrupt end. In many ways I continue to deal with that loss, my emotional attachment undiminished by the passage of time.
And, then to continue, to continue with a paraphrase of Nenad’s final paragraph . . .
However, within the confines of my mind, “family” is assuming a healing power, bringing renewed sense of belonging and restored awareness of who I am and where I come from. Rather than being a mere repository of melancholic memories, it feels like the impenetrable fortress of my boyish escapism that it once was. Resurging in my dreams and meditations, uncalled for, but warmly welcomed, my “family” is still intact.
Nenad, I have already told you how beautiful and awesome your post of this morning is. Now you see why I said what I did. And I can’t thank you enough for the miraculous timing of the posting of your blog entry.
But back to family. Its intactness. Made up of concentric circles, yet intact.
And Betty, and Nenad, and KinNet, and River Road Unitarian Church and people with whom I work, and a whole bunch of others, yes. You are my family.
And my mother, my siblings, my children, my grandchildren, my extended biological connection. You are my family.
And some of you may even have wept with me a couple of weeks ago when my family chastised me for my desire for them to try to understand what Brokeback Mountain has meant to me.
But I don’t think the concept of family has ever changed.
What has changed is how I now think about its composition, its function, its purpose, and its power in essence of diversity for sustaining the survival of humanity itself.
The Refectory Manager
posted by The Refectory Manager | 7:50 PM
1 Comments:
We accumulate family memebers much as we save rain, snow and other forms of moisture; Rainbarrels are set out to collect this life-H2O and buckets are carried to and fro from wells, springs and streams.
We cannot "do" without water.
Family is life-giving.
No one can live fully or long without either.
We build a family from friendships and gene pools -- much as we might build a cake with love and care. Both are the ingredients of life and our lives become richer within this mix.
Mary Lynn
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